smile for me. (:

it's five o'four am in the morning, blog. and i can't convince myself to go bedding. the insomnia monster is not exactly attacking me again. but it's just that..i have lost the will to sleep. even with momther and dadther reprimanding me and marching down the stairs every eight minutes to check up on me and ordering me to bed i just sit there and grow numb to the bed calls.

i'm so tired of meticulously planning out my schedule and working hard to finish everything that needs to be done to strive for adequate amount of sleep--which is to no avail since i have frequent sleeping revolutions. i don't care if i am being murderous towards my precious liver that only rests from 11pm-2am. i don't care if i am harming my health. i don't care if i am defying romans 12:1. eek. i think i've become a dot that doesn't care.

hi. i am a dot. and i am angry that i need sleep.

did you know that ever since i was five years old, i despised sleep with a passion?! as a baby, i made my mother suffer because i didn't sleep much and i kept her up night and day. as a child, i used to let my imagination run loose on the walls with crayons during naptime and my horrified mother would come running and spank me and tell me that walls did not equal paper. at night, i would be forced to go to bed and when my parents would switch on the lights to check if we're sound asleep, i would have to pretend to sleep and shut my eyes very tightly. but they're smart parents so they always knew i was wide awake..and i would get scolded. (but sometimes they were nice and read me another bedtime story and let me eat a midnight snack.)

my sleeping patterns after that were not very consistent nor respectable. one thing i know: i'm not very talented at sleeping. before long from junior high to high school, the insomnia monster started visiting me. and he wasn't very nice.

but i've scared him away now. hopefully always.

okay. i think my sleeping revolutionary walls are wearing down. i think i am tired now. darn. i lose again.

alskdj. my parents tell me that God made night so we could rest and sleep. and He wants us to take care of our bodies. i'm sorry, God for not respecting Your temple. gah. that must mean i must go bedding instantaneously if that's a word. (bytheway, trog is a word.)

i need to keep my new years resolution of bedding by eleven thirty-two pm. hah. me and sleep will be the best of friends. i shall spend some quality time with him this summer. i am very determined. encourage me, shanks.

p.s. if i were a bug, i'd either be a) a junebug, b) a lovebug or c) a treebug. those bugs are rad.