smile for me. (:

i'm sad. my blog entry got deleted. for the first time in two months. *sob* it makes me not want to blog anymore.

-_- i knoe. it's not your fault, blog. it's the BLOG SERVER's fault. your dad. ._. i'm angry at your father, blog. @_@ he didn't let my entry go through and EVERYTHING erased!

and i forgot what i wrote because it was four hours ago and i was too disturbed to do my entry all over again. so i just did my homework. and went to go to sleep. because i was all alone at home. -_- ALL BY MYSELF. ._. the first time i was home alone.

actually, i was home alone once. it was after school one day and everyone went somewhere and i didn't knoe. and i stayed at home for about three hours all alone. -_- and i was SO scared. @_@

and today uncle [dennis] sent me and christina home because my parents, angela, abraham and marianna had to stay at church and then go to uncle joe's house. and christina had to leave the house right afterwards to go to her friend's house to work on history day project. -_- so i was left home by myself.

it was too quiet. and the house kept making creaking noises. -_-

._. and there was no one to talk to. no one to do homework with. no loud chatter, laughing, singing. no one practicing the piano, or shouting, or messing up the house. -_- and i felt so forlorn.

so i read us history but then it was so depressing--how the grant administration was so corrupted and all these revolts and inflation. -_- but it's my favorite textbook. (: i even get to highlight and write in it. ehehe. jordan let me have it. or i should say, borrow it. it's stamped: ruben s. ayala high school on each side of the book. and i retured my us book to the bookroom because it was broken. -_-

@_@ so i was alone. and to stop thinking about it, i went to sleep. but i couldn't sleep for a long time. because i was thinking about us kwans.

i think i must've been lovesick. *_*

so i was walking out of church with chrism, christina, uncle, wilbur, and jordan when we see william and hubert--gabey's twin friends. they haven't come for the longest time. ._. i think they felt embarrassed. because we were talking to them at once. i was trying to talk to them but jordan kept cutting me off. @_@

they said they don't come because they don't have a ride. well, when i drive i'm going to give THEM a ride. and whoever wants me to drive them around and of course the rest of the kwans.

it's funny. because gabey has so many two pair of twin friends. william and hubert. and alex and brian. actually alex and brian are his cousins so nevermind, blog.

and i also saw ERIKA. erika and angie. their church borrowed our place for their baptism and erika was getting baptized. (: wow..someone i haven't seen for almost three years. @_@

and erika was driving too. -_- she said: yea..i've been driving for a year now.

._. i REALLY need to start soon. even sunny's taking driving lessons already. -_-

but yes. it was pleasant seeing erika again. and angie.

but i'll see angie tomorroe. because i see her every single day in ms. morales' room, working on the yearboook--which i got rejected from. ._.

so we were in timmy's car going back to church and jerry mentions about how i said robbers were scary people in my last entry:

besides, robbers are scary people. @_@ posted by Evangeline Kwan 12:52 AM

and then he said: i steal, evangeline. am I SCARY?

and i said: yes.

and i think i "disproved" his point because his face fell and he said: okae.

but then i said just kidding because jerry's not a scary boy.

-_- i didn't mean to say all robbers were scary people. because some are not.

but i always did view them as scary because--i always thought of robbers as people who lurked around the corners of the house and sneaked in the house. you knoe, people that looked like horace and jasper from 101 dalmatian dogs.

but that's stereotyping. -_- i guess i did that on accident. sorrie robbers. i knoe you guys don't look like horace and jasper.

and robbers could be nice too. except they take things from people and that's not nice. and they're normal people too.

hence, not all robbers are scary. but SOME are.

if someone wants to rob our house, they should just tell us so we could give them what they want. that way, not only do they get a present they won't have to steal. and feel bad about it. yes.

sarah came to church, today blog. (: and she sat by me too. *beam* but i think she had no choice because she had nowhere else to sit. -_-

aiyah. i forgot to give back her pen too. -_- she'll probably think i'll stole it too. @_@

(: timmy, spenroe, and jordan were going to get us a tree yesterdae since they went tree shopping. but they didn't. -_-

but that's okae. like they say, "it's all about the heart" *beat heart simultaneously* :D

i guess i did feel like blogging, blog. -_- my throat hurts. and my eyes do too. my contact fell out and i couldn't find it.

it was worser than trying to catch a stupid cockroach for christina's bug collection. her bugs are due real soon for bio. i think in january. and she has no bugs. so if you find a bug that's dead or alive, please give it to christina. because she really needs them.

so it was yesterdae and angela screams: evangeline! there's a bug!

and i automatically tense up and shudder. i could remember how in freshmen year i tried to pin a grasshopper except its legs were still moving. ;aiosjda;osdj. *shudder* ;oaisjd;oi;. @_@ you don't understand, blog. it was so a;lsidj. -_-

and then we were going to kill it but i remember christina had to collect bugs for bio. so christina runs over with her killer jar and stands there telling me to hurry and catch it.

-_- so angela gives me a paper cup and i chase the grasshopper. -_- it's such a fast runner. i bet if it was in crosscountry, it'll beat everyone. or it should be in long jump for track.

(note: joe was in long jump last last year and he kicked himself in the face. eheheh.)

so *dun dun dun* i caught it. (:

except when i was trying to put it in the jar the grasshopper's head popped out scared me half to death. so me and christina jerked back. and i accidentally threw up the cup in the air. ;asodija;soidj. it was so scary. we were screaming for three seconds. @_@

then i see the grasshopper on the floor again and we crouch down on the carpet and try to get it but then ANOTHER tiny bug crawls up out of nowhere and by that time i was getting spasms because of the bugs.

especially bugs from freshmen year. i could just visualize how the legs were moving when they were dying. and the smell. and ;oasidj;okj. -_- i can't go on, blog. i think i'm traumatized for life.

i knew i shouldn't have killed the bugs. -_- maybe God's punishing me.

just kidding. He's not.

and then christina keeps shouting about how the grasshopper's going to get away so i keep trying to get it in the cup but of course it kept going the opposite way.

and in the end, it got away. in the garage. and ALL christina said was: good.

-_- i was SO EXASPERATED. and stressed.

and i couldn't stop thinking about it. -_-

and i'm STILL thinking about it now. ._.

today after running around the track my feet were in excruciating pain and so my coach made me take off my shoes and my socks.

then he looked at my foot and said: oh my goodness!

and i said: what! what happened?!

but he kind of ignored me and kept saying to himself: oh my goodness, my goodness.

i was about to strangle him but then he said: evangeline this is why your feet's been hurting for the past few years. you have flat feet.

and i let the words sink in. but i was puzzled. i didn't knoe what flat feet was. -_-

i was confused, blog. feet that was flat?! what's so bad about flat feet? aren't all feet flat? because if they're triangular or round on the bottom--people wouldn't even be walking. @_@

._. so i asked him what flat feet was and he told me that it's when you don't have an arch on the side of your foot and it's supposed to relax the muscle or something. i wasn't really listening after that because i was sad. because i had flat feet. then he made this girl take off her shoes and her socks and he showed me what an arch was. and then he said: you don't have that.

then i felt bad for not having an arch. so i said sorrie. ._. but he said it wasn't bad to have flat feet. so i sighed with relief and skipped away.

i told joseph that i had flat feet and he said: oh really?! aww that sucks. it's a disadvantage to people who do sports especially running. too bad for you. you'd run way faster if you didn't have flat feet.

and sabrina said: you have flat feet?! that means you can't walk a lot. and flat-footed people aren't allowed to join the army because they can't walk.

and everyone else just laughed about it. -_- or said: aww that sucks.

-_- erhg. my coach lied. flat feet IS bad. especially for crosscountry and track. @_@ and i can't join the army?!

._. i was thinking i might join the army just for fun. or marines. jerry told me to. but i guess not. BECAUSE people with flat feet can't join the army.

oh well. steph told me not to join anyway. but i heard that you get to run if you join the army. (: run five miles every morning. and of course a lot more.

FLAT FEET. does that mean i run like a duck? ._.

*sob* i don't think i want flat feet, blog.

and how come no one ever told me that i had flat feet?! -_-

oh wait. mrs. chan did. i remember one time i went to the chan's house and she mentioned that i had flat feet. but at the time i didn't even knoe what she talking about. so i said: thank you. @_@ aosid. she must've thought i was a stupid girl.

-_- okae. i don't want to think about it anymore, blog. maybe i should just run on my toes like kyle said.

or i'll just pretend that i don't have flat feet and believe that i have a beautiful arch on the side of my foot. (:

-_- but that's not true. i'll be tricking myself for life. i wish coach didn't tell me that i had flat feet today. and if he didn't, i'd probably never find out that i had flat feet and feel unsad.

and i checked christina, angela and abraham's feet to see if they had flat feet but they all have pretty arches and no flat feet. -_- i'm going to check my parents' and marianna's tomorroe. and steph's when she comes back.

and if NONE of them have flat feet, i'm going to cry. ._. i don't want to be the only kwan to have flat feet. *_*

so i hope one of the kwans have flat feet. that'll make me feel better.

if you become a person, blog, i hope you get flat feet. then you'll get to be like me. (:

oh well. i have flat feet. -_- and God made me that way. so i'll be happy.

i was talking to jonathan yesterday and he was sad. ._. poor jonathan. he's one of the people that i really don't like seeing sad. and i began to feel kind of sad too. ._.

it's weird because i was sad on thursday. and *dun dun dun* it was the same reason as jonathan's.

A zNrICE 8OY: it's just funny
A zNrICE 8OY: just how we're on the same page

ehehe. we became books yesterday. ahaha get it?! and we're on the SAME PAGE!

and if you see us, i'm the blue book and he's the pink book. (:

AzN cHiNk GuY: yer blog is seriosly interestin
AzN cHiNk GuY: i bet if you put it in a college app it would be awesome

-_- i can't believe reube reads my blog. i can't believe anyone reads my blog. i can't even believe i'm blogging right now. -_- a;soid. okae. i'm going to make myself believe that i'm blogging.

maybe i SHOULD start on my college essay early huh. i'll write one paragraph everyday. that way next year i'll be all done. while everyone has to panick about their's. like jordan. he was panicking about his essay. he said he mentioned me in it. (: i'm referred to as the "drummer." but of course my name is not mentioned in there. -_-

christmas shopping is so stressing. -_- i went for the first time this year with christina and terry. we went to brea mall to find out that we couldn't afford anything there. @_@

i told chrisl that i wish i was at rich as reube and spenroe but then he said reube is a cheap boy. -_- don't worry, reube. i don't think you are.

but i'm serious. if only i had infinite dollars, i could buy steph a credit card and support her hilton orphanage, buy my father a bright shiny red pick up truck and my mother a mercedes and costco and a maid to clean up the house, christina a dance studio and complete wardrobe and angela an art studio and pants, abraham--a library and his own computer, marianna--a mirror house and loads of white paper so that we won't yell at her for wasting computer paper when she wants to draw. and whatever they want.

and cover up church's funds. and give to the poor. and to the rich. to wilson high school so that they could remodel everything so that it'll look even better than diamond bar hs. and to fix the "w" that faces the 60 freeway. and to buy everyone a nice expensive birthday present and also christmas gift so that they'll feel special. and probably give money to the president if he wants any.

and to anyone who wants any too.

and treat people out to lunch anytime they want.

and so i could buy my pink slip, permit, and license. and a letterman jacket. so that the patches have somewhere to belong. and a grand piano. and a bass guitar. and a NEW drum set. so i wouldn't have to use the old purple set at church. -_-

so i could buy a the biggest house in the world so everyone can come and play.

and so i could walk through brea mall and afford to buy something.

and lastly, to free you, blog.

but yes. if i had an unlimited amount of money, i'd just throw it up in the air and pass it out to people.

actually, there's too many things that i'd do--i think my brain is about to explode and my heart from the excitement.

but i can't get too excited about it because it's not going to even happen. sadly to say, it all belongs to the land of if only. -_-

oh well. we don't really need money anyway.

i learned a song in second grade. it was in my level two piano book. it was a sing-along song that went like this:

money can't buy everything
money can't make you a king
money can't buy you success
money can't buy happiness
but for one thing i am sure
money doesn't make you poor
money doesn't make you sad
money can't be all that bad.

yes. money can't buy happiness. ahahaha! i don't need money. here, you can have it blog. i think i have two dollars and eighty-two cents in my wallet.

just kidding. i need money to buy christmas presents. -_-

so we went to target to see if there was anything we could afford and to tj max too. and chrisl showed up and he said he'll buy me those kind of cars that always ram into the wall for my christmas present because that describes me. -_- i was not amused.

well, blog--jordan's not angry at me anymore. (: thank goodness. *shudder* it was so scary. but i guess i learned my lesson. along with sarah and gloria. -_-

i just remember the guys: wilso, wilbur, timmy, spenroe and alex laughing really hard--especially WILSO--laughing the hardest, longest, and loudest. -_-

tatdatassup: no more jackin cars
tatdatassup: or you'll really get arrested instead of jordan yelling at you

-_- and he kept calling me a car jacker. but i'm not. ._.

oh well. jordan was nice about it afterwards. and he said he didn't feel bad for yelling at me. -_- but of course he won the argument for the day. well we're still best friends, RIGHT jordan?

._. i hope we are, blog. don't worry. i think you're my best friend too. (:

my mother scared my father today. (: which is good, because he never gets scared. every time we try to scare him from behind the door he just pretends that he gets scared and says: ahhhhhh! in a very exaggerated way. -_-

she said: OH I KNOE! in cantonese: ah! ngo jzi doh lah! and it was so abrupt and loud that it scared him. (: ehehe. i saw him jump up.

and when someone gets scared, they look rather undignified and feel embarrassed. and i guess my father felt undignified because he told my mother not to scream like that again. or else he'll suffer from a heart attack. (: eheh. and he said it four times after that to make sure she understood. but she wasn't listening to him because she was deep in thought.

i saw santa clause but i couldn't find the elf. -_-

oh i knoe, blog. maybe santa's waiting for me to show up to work. :D